Husband and Daddy here again:
Let's start this off with a few things that I have learned to strive for in my parenting:
(1) My children to see a model of God's love and discipline through my actions and words.
(2) To be filled with grace and truth and have the wisdom to know which to use and when.
(3) My actions and words to be so much like God's that the more they are drawn to my love, the more they are drawn to his.
This has led to a few Ah-Ha truths.
(1) Some instances require truth and discipline, while others require grace and talking.
(2) With all instances, the goal is to get the child to open up her heart and emotions and even talk about it. This is much more likely to happen when circumstances are handled with complete grace and nothing that JJ might see as punishment.
(3) JJ will do things because she believes something false about herself, and any discipline she receives for that behavior only reinforces in her brain that the falsehood is once again true. This cycle must be broken creatively, firmly, and lovingly.
(4) JJ's discipline and Sarah's discipline might look different and that's still fair. After all, God's word says to "train a child in the way SHE should go, and when she is old, she will not depart from it." There will be times when the fairest discipline might mean different consequences. It might even look like JJ getting grace and Sarah getting truth.
Their hearts are the goal. I want to model that with my heart and lead them into their own. I can't do that unless I love them like God does. And here's the really sucky part: some people still don't let God into their hearts. Translation: even if I love them like God loves us, they still might not let me in.
All I can do is try.
Sincerely,
More selfish than he realized.
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